A man can have no money in the beginning but he must have backbone and ambition

Repost from the net

When I was 20 years old, my father told me one thing that turn out to be one of the best life and financial advise any father can give it to his son,

“Expect no support from me when you decided to get married.

 Do not accept a single cent from your in laws family too. If you have money, do the usual stuff like wedding dinner and buy a place in your own terms.

If you have no money, register your ROM, go back home, offer one glass of clear water and a joss stick to your grandma on the altar, ask for blessing and then sleep on a simple mattress with your wife.

A man can have no money in the beginning but he must have backbone and ambition”

I took it to heart and did just that when I married my wife in 2009 at age 33. From buying the car, house, wedding dinner to honeymoon, all within 6 months, I need no financial support. In fact, I do not even care whether the wedding Ang Baos can cover back the cost of the dinner or not because me and my wife viewed it as joyful occasion to celebrate with our loved ones and friends. My in-laws was slightly concerned because I was paying for everything in Singapore. I even insist of paying for a second dinner in KL (requested by my in-laws because my wife is a Malaysian) but was rejected strongly by my father in-law because he felt the need to do something for his only daughter. But little do they know, their daughter married a financially very sound man with strong values.

And I will tell the same to my daughters (and sons) too because I finally understood the true meaning of my father statement especially for a man. Why?

Because Marriage signify a major milestone in any adult life that both parties are willing to build their future together; Their own future together.

For the man, it is telling the world that you are able to take care and protect your life partner. Spend what you can least afford for the wedding because it is not just a show for one day, it is a lifetime commitment.

You do not want to start this holy commitment with foolish debt. And if you need two families support just to get married, when can you ever stand up on your own feet?

Be a man, do the right thing.

P/S: If my daughters request any diamond rings from her future husband to be, they will receive serious lashing from me. And if my future son in-law spent 1-3 months of his salaries on a diamond ring just to show how much he ‘love’ my daughter and yet struggle financially, I will urge my daughter to think thrice about marrying this guy. Romance without finance is nuisance.

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